My fiance and I have been together for a few years. About a year in, her mom told me she was gang-raped in college by her ex and his friends at a party . Her assaulters were never charged despite a long legal battle. My fiancé has never told me herself, and I’ve never brought it up or acted like I knew because I didn’t want her to feel exposed or like her trauma was being shared without her consent.
Yesterday we were both at an event and she ran into her ex. I recognized him immediately from stalking his ig from when her mom told me. I genuinely wanted to punch him when I saw him, but I held it together for her sake. She left mid-event and been locked in her bedroom ever since we got home and I don’t know how to reach her.
I’m torn in every direction right now. I don’t want to push her to talk, but I also can’t pretend nothing happened. I can’t tell her I know why she’s hurting without admitting I’ve known for years . And I can’t just do nothing when she’s clearly in a really dark place.
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